You Are Not
by Pemuldaby
Summary: Tsunade is sending Hana, Tenten, Rin, Sakura, and Hinata on a kunoichi mission. Itachi, Neji, Kakashi, Sasuke, and Naruto aren't quite happy with that. AU


Another disclaimer...NO...!

I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR THE CHARACTERS. THEY BELONG TO MASASHI KISHIMOTO...! So, do not sue me. Please.

* * *

"You are not."

"Yes I am."

"No."

"Itachi…! It's for the village…!"

"No, Hana, you are not."

"How come you could wipe out your whole clan excluding Sasuke but I can't go on a seduction mission for the village?"

"..."

"I am going!" Hana declared, ignoring the Uchiha's silent response and dark aura.

"No."

"We need to collect information about a group of assassins, Itachi. It's for the good of the village." Hana protested.

Itachi stared at her before replying, "…What do you mean by 'we'?"

"I'll be working with Hinata, Sakura, Rin, and Tenten."

"…_What?"_

"You heard me, Itachi."

"I'm going to have a talk with the Hokage."

"Hey! What do you mean by that? I'm going on the darn seduction mission, Uchiha Itachi, whether you like it or not!"

* * *

"Hey! You guys maybe some of the top shinobi in the world, but that does _not_ mean that all you _five_ can enter the room to see Tsunade-sama!"

"Too bad, I'm going in. And my fellow buddies are following."

"Hey! Sto-!"

"Granny Tsunade!"

"Tsunade-sama." Four people said in one voice.

Tsunade looked up from her never-ending pile of paperwork to see a seething Naruto, two very calm-yet-furious Uchihas, one _extremely_ ticked off Hyuuga, and Kakashi. "Yes?" she questioned.

Naruto pointed a finger at her and glared. "How come you're planning to send Hinata on a _seduction_ mission?"

"It's needed, Naruto."

Sasuke, Itachi, and Kakashi interrupted. "Is there a need to send medical nins…?"

Tsunade glared at the three. "Sakura, Hana, and Rin are capable ninjas. I thought that you three knew that."

Itachi opened his mouth to speak, "We don't doubt their abilities, Tusnade-sama."

Sasuke continued, "I just don't see the reason why you need to send three medical nins."

Tsunade scoffed, "Obviously, you're not as intelligent as your brother. I'm not sending them as medic nins. They're not going to do any medical duties unless it is called for."

"Is there really a need to send five kunoichis though?" Neji asked.

"Yes, Neji. There are a band of assassins, around four to five. I want the girls to divide and conquer."

"Why not send Ino or Kurenai?" Naruto interjected.

Tsunade looked at Naruto as if he was an idiot. "Kurenai's _pregnant_. I can't send a pregnant kunoichi on a seduction mission, or any mission for that matter!"

"What about Ino?" Sasuke asked.

"I really don't want to start a war by sending Ino on a seduction mission…" Tsunade trailed off uneasily.

"Ehh…?" Naruto said confusedly, "What do you mean? Sending Ino on a seduction mission won't cause a war!"

Neji, Itachi, Kakashi, and Sasuke all caught on, Sasuke asking his idiot for a best friend, "Who is Ino currently dating?"

"Gaara. Duh."

"Exactly. Neji stated.

"But how is that going to start a war?"

"Are you seriously that slow?" Sasuke demanded. "Think. Gaara's one of your closest friends. What would he do if Tsunade-sama sends Ino on a _seduction_ mission?"

"What would he do…? Oh…!" Naruto exclaimed. "That's what you meant, Granny Tsunade!"

"Yes. That's what I meant. That's why I'm not sending Ino on any seduction missions."

"Must you send Tenten?" Neji questioned. "Everybody knows her strengths are definitely not in seduction."

"Yes, Neji. Even though pretty much everybody knows that Tenten isn't made for seduction missions, but there are few kunoichi that I can send."

Before anybody else could ask a question or comment, Naruto announced, "I won't let Hinata go!"

Tsunade merely raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yes! She's the heiress of the Hyuuga Clan, and she's my girlfriend!"

Tsunade sighed, "Naruto, if all the kunoichi in this village were dating, and their boyfriends don't allow me to send them on seduction missions, then how am I supposed to collect information on our enemies?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Naruto fired back. "That's your job."

Tsunade stared at Naruto dryly, "You're the one who's always declaring, 'I'm going to be the Hokage!', so why don't _you_ try solving the problem. I'll see if you're fit to be the next Hokage-"

Itachi interrupted, "You're right, Tsunade-sama. The kunoichi should be allowed to go for the sake of the village."

"You're chickening out already?" Sasuke asked.

"Your brother is not chickening out, Sasuke." Kakashi replied. "He's just doing what is right. And because of that, I'm following his judgment and letting Rin go."

Sasuke looked at his ex-sensei in shock. "What do you mean by 'what is right'?"

Neji's brows furrowed as he thought and made his decision and decided to speak. "I agree with Kakashi and Itachi. I don't want to let Tenten go, but it is for the good of the village."

"You too?" Naruto exploded.

Kakashi sighed heavily. "Naruto. Sasuke. Look at the situation this way. If you two were sent on an extremely dangerous S-rank mission, would you two accept?"

"Of course." Sasuke answered, for both Naruto and himself.

"Precisely." Itachi continued.

Kakashi turned toward Sasuke. "Besides, do you _really_ want to face the wrath of your dear cherry blossom?"

"Um..."

"So?" Naruto inquired. "What does that prove?"

On the other hand, Sasuke nodded his head, finally getting what his brother, ex-sensei, and Neji were trying to get across.

"Hey, teme, Granny Tsunade. Do you know what these three are trying to say?"

"Yes."

"How come I don't?"

"Because you're an idiot." Sasuke muttered under his breath.

"I heard that!"

Kakashi tried to explain to Naruto. "If you don't let Hinata go on the seduction mission, then it's like Hinata not allowing you to go on the dangerous S-rank mission."

"But Hinata would never do that to me!" Naruto reasoned.

Kakashi muttered to Neji. "Your turn. It's obvious that he won't listen to me even though I was his sensei."

Neji stared at Kakashi before whispering, "If he won't listen to you, then why will he listen to me?"

"Just give it a shot."

"Naruto."

"Ehh? What, Neji?"

"Let Hinata go on the mission."

"Why are you doing this? She's your cousin!"

"Let Hinata go on the mission, Naruto."

"Why-"

"She'll be extremely upset if she missed her chance to help and protect the village, Naruto."

"But-"

"She might even start ignoring you."

"That's not-"

"Isn't that all you've wanted to do, Naruto?" Sasuke asked, putting his two cents in.

"Yeah-"

"That's what we all want to do." Tsunade added.

"All of the ninjas in the Leaf would die to protect it." Itachi stated.

"I know-"

"Then let Hinata have her chance at it." Neji finished.

"But-"

"No buts." Tsunade scolded.

"Besides," Kakashi pointed out, "won't you be perturbed if you were kept away from your chance help and defend Konoha?"

"But-"

"I said no 'buts'!" Tsunade scolded again.

"But-"

"No 'buts'!"

"…But-"

"Naruto!" Tsunade said sharply, "No 'buts'!"

"What if Hinata has to…to…"

"She won't have to, and nor will Hana, Sakura, Tenten, and Rin have to go as far as that."

All the males in the Hokage's office exhaled in relief, "Thank goodness…"

Tsunade glanced at Shizune before murmuring, "Possessive, aren't they?"

Shizune smiled and answered softly, "That's all men, even Shikamaru."

Once again, the Hokage only raised her eyebrows while she said in a very quiet voice, "Of Temari, eh?" Then she waved her hand and said, "Is that all you guys wanted to talk about? If it is, please leave; I have a lot of paperwork to do."

They nodded and left.

* * *

"You win," Itachi murmured.

Hana looked at him in confusion. "What do you mean by 'I win'?"

"You can go on the seduction mission."

That was a very bad idea, Uchiha Itachi. Hana's aura suddenly grew darker, just like his moments before he went to confront the Fifth Hokage, "What do you mean by _'can'_?"

Itachi sensed the change in the air around her. What did he do that made her mad…? "I'm letting you go, Hana. Is it not obvious?"

Silly, silly, Uchiha.

He was going to _get _it. "When exactly did I need your permission to do anything, Itachi…?"

Oh. So _that's_ what made her mad… "…"

"Uchiha Itachi. You did _not_ just go all stoic on your girlfriend."

"…" Silence is golden though…

"_Uchiha Itachi._"

Itachi was not afraid of anything. He was not. Anything should include Inuzuka Hana, but in his case…it doesn't.

"Yes?"

"You haven't answered my question yet. _When did I need to have your permission to do anything?_" Hana asked, her voice deadly.

"...When it involved seduction missions."

Hana threw up her hands in exasperation. "Itachi! This isn't my first seduction mission! Besides, I'll be with Sakura, Tenten, Hinata, and Rin! I'll be _fine_!"

Itachi's head shot up. "This isn't your first seduction mission?"

"Yeah, it isn't my first. Why do you seem so surprised…? Hana asked. "Wait…you seriously thought that I wasn't made for this kind of stuff…?"

Itachi shook his head. "No Hana, I never thought that. I just thought that the Hokage would've let you stay in the village since you're one of the top vets…"

Hana sighed and dropped into the couch, next to Itachi and snuggled with him. "It's sweet of you to be all worried and protective, Itachi, but save it when missions and the village is concerned, okay?"

Itachi's lips curved into a small smile, "I'll try, Hana. But there's no guarantees."

"Well, at least I know you tried, and that's good enough for me."

* * *

A/N: Crappy ending...I need to work on my endings...! By the way, I'm sorry if I made Itachi a bit OOC...it's so hard to 'write' him...


End file.
